This particular teacher said that the following paragraph contained “too much medical information” and was “too long and impersonal”.
They reckoned that it would “Whilst shadowing in GI surgery, I observed a necrotic pancreatitis patient in severe septic shock who required a pancreatectomy.
Teachers may be giving the wrong advice about how to write personal statements for UK universities.
Research by the Sutton Trust found that when school teachers and admissions tutors at universities judged the same personal statements, their evaluations were very different.
In some cases, teachers said that a personal statement increase the chances of the applicant getting accepted to university, while the admissions tutor responsible for those kinds of decisions took the opposite stance.
Using examples from the research, the following teachers’ tips are ones that you might want to take with a pinch of salt: This sounds like good advice: tell the admissions tutor why you want to study your chosen subject.
Don’t say something that everyone will say, and don’t just define the aims of the field.
Universities are all about pushing the boundaries of what we know and understand, using original thought, examples and arguments.
This is typified by the Tony Nicklinson case, whereby he fought for his right to die, resulting in the High Court’s majority ruling against his wish for assisted suicide is evidence of Bentham’s ethics in practice.” But the admissions tutor worried that the example rested on a misunderstanding of utilitarianism, saying: “I’m not really sure this is a sustainable claim – unclear how the case could be said to be based on utilitarian ethics.” The tutor said that the statement the chances for the applicant.
A thorough, deep and personal interest in a subject, coupled with a solid understanding and demonstrated flair for your studies, is often more than enough to impress the tutors.